Body image issues affect around 1 in 3 adults in the UK, and studies suggest this number is growing. An important part of building a healthy relationship with food is looking beyond the exterior, including when we compliment one another.
Body image issues cause high levels of distress for the person. In part, social media is likely to have an impact on the rise of body image issues, with 1 in 5 adults and 40% of teenagers saying images on social media cause them to feel worried about their appearance.
How Can Changing Compliments Help?
One of the things we can do as a society is to change the way we are complimenting one another. Instead of appearance-related compliments, start to consider what else you value in the people around you. Making this shift not only supports you with your body image healing journey but contributes to a much-needed change across society.
Body Comments
Working with clients in this field, too often I see body image issues and eating disorders that can be traced back to body comments. Perhaps it was fat-shaming as a child or compliments on weight loss following a diet.
It is so important to bear in mind that the majority of people who lose weight, do not keep that weight off in the long term, and often engage in disordered dieting behaviours in order to try to keep their weight down.
There are many types of bodies in this world, some people naturally have smaller bodies and some naturally larger.
All bodies matter.
What about health?
So many people say, but what about ‘obesity’, isn’t there a point it’s unhealthy to be living in a larger body?
The truth is, you cannot tell just by looking at someone if they are healthy or unhealthy. The narrative that larger bodies are unhealthy and smaller bodies are healthy needs to change.
There are many people living in larger bodies who are healthy and active. There are many people living in smaller bodies that lead unhealthy lifestyles.
In order to create a healthier culture we need to stop fat-shaming and we need to stop encouraging the strive for thinness.
Because health is certainly not a body size.
Anorexia and compliments
As for eating disorder recovery, one of the largest setbacks for those in recovery from anorexia comes from body comments. The well-intended ‘you look so much better like this’ or ‘you look way healthier now’ often kicks in as people begin to restore to a healthy weight.
However well-intended, these comments speak to the eating disorder and affirm the sufferer that they are sufficiently recovered. If they are eating a high level of food to continue with re-nourishment they may be tempted to stop. If they are still working through recovery, they may start to feel they are no longer worthy of support.
This is a very common situation that occurs for those who are in recovery from an eating disorder. It is so important for us all to remember that eating disorders are not weight disorders, they are complex mental illnesses.
10 Things to Compliment Someone On Other Than Appearance
So what can we compliment people on other than appearance? Here are 10 examples to inspire us all:
- You are such a great listener. I appreciate you being there when I need someone to talk to.
- I love how passionate you are about the things you care about.
- You have the best energy. It really lifts me up being around you.
- I appreciate how non-judgemental you are. I can talk to you about anything.
- You are so strong. I admire how resilient you are despite everything you have been through.
- Your honesty is something I really appreciate. I know I can count on you to tell me the truth.
- I appreciate how generous you are. All your gifts are always super thoughtful.
- You are such a kind friend. Thank you for always checking in on me.
- I feel so inspired by you. It’s so nice knowing someone who isn’t afraid to be themself.
- You are so clever. I always learn so much when I am with you.
What are some non-appearance-based compliments that you can think of for the people in your life?
Let us know on Instagram or Facebook, or get in touch if you’re looking for support for yourself or a loved one.
